letting go and clicking publish

I've decided I'm going to power through these blogs. Last week I spent a day each on my blogs. Yes, one day to write and rewrite ONE blog. Would someone with massive insecurity and OCD do it any other way? So as of today I'm going to... (as the multimillion dollar athletes tell us) "Just do it!" And let me add, they "just do it" because someone is also paying them millions of dollars. I, on the other hand, am paid in "personal accomplishment." All things being equal I'd rather live a shallow life on a Lakers salary. Or write a blog on a Lakers salary. (why not... when a bell rings an angel gets its wings, when someone blogs something must happen in the universe)

So from now on I will just write the damn thing. No more, "Honey, can you read this before I post it?" Not that I don't ADORE feedback (of the constructive uplifting kind of course) but all a perfectionist needs is another person giving them input. "You mean that made sense if I changed it, or you think it still makes sense if I don't change it?" So today when my fiance asked if he could read my blog I said, "Sure, but I already posted it." I think we were both surprised. And I added, "But no notes." Then I went to the kitchen and got myself some tea. After five minutes of no comment from his end I started to get the perfectionist jitters. "Did I nail it? Did I blow it? Is he stunned into silence by the content? Is he taking time to dab his eyes after laughing so hard he cried?" Finally he stepped out of my office and said tentatively "I know you don't want me to give you notes but do you want to know about the typos?"

Well, yes, of course I want to know about the typos. At least typos lead to constructive obsessing. I like to change those. As a writer I spend so much time looking at the typos they start to look normal. Finding typos is like a public service announcement. Nobody likes to hear them but everybody benefits. My favorite typo was "Cheetio." A cross between a Cheeto and a Cheerio. He asked if I meant to do that. I said no and changed it to Cheetos. Though I like "Cheetios" as a typo. It could be a new snack food for adulterers, "New from Kellogg's... Cheetios! A quick pick-me-up snack for cheaters! When you get the munchies between the cheap motel and home... think Cheetios!"

So, I fixed the typos and hit "publish post" again and let it go. It only took me an hour or so to do the whole blog. Not a day. And I typed in the code for underlining and I did a photo link ALL BY MYSELF.

I think I deserve a big bowl of Cheetios.

(Photo)